And there goes my goal.

I am tired. I am exhausted. And I didn't get to a Disney anything today. There goes my streak.

I spent 6 very good, very long, very tiring days with my family. I yelled at my housemate on behalf of another housemate. I cried just from the sheer exhaustion. I miss home. So I stayed in bed, literally all day. I've gotten up for the bathroom and for poptarts and for gatorade. I spent all day watching Doctor Who, playing Minecraft, talking to Tanya, listening to thunder, watching silly YouTube videos, and waiting for the "we're home safe" text from my Dad.

And I'm still tired. Mom would say that's because I didn't do anything all day, and Mom? You're definitely right. But over the last two days my mental awareness and awake-ness and interest and etc and etc have just plummeted. Maybe that's because my family left. Maybe that's because I'm tired.

Or maybe, that's because I'm tired of being here. I'm tired of being cast-member-friendly. I'm tired of Disney-hopping. I miss spending all day not talking to a single person and not having any human contact at all. I miss it a lot.

And that probably sounds insane to every single person who read this (yes, Dad, even you. I know you miss Mom when she's not there). But I've had four years where I didn't have to interact with any other living soul if I didn't want to. And four years where most weeks I had at least one day that I didn't leave the house at all. And I value my alone time.

Don't get me wrong, I love Emily to pieces. But we share a room. And it's her room too. And I can't tell her to stay away.

Eight weeks of making sure you get out of the house to be social every day is very hard for the extremely introverted. I wanted to make it ten, and today I failed. I was going to go to fireworks at MK tonight, but the rain made it even less appealing than getting out of bed already was.

I am dreading work tomorrow. But you know? It's almost done. And I know I'll cry when I have to go home because I won't want to go back to an anti-social life. I like having the option of doing something every single night with different people. I like being with people who want to do things and I like being okay with going with large groups or small groups or by myself. And dammit, I'm proud of myself! I've come so far in eight short weeks. So, so far.

This is confusing. Do I want to park hop with fellow Disney-crazies, or stay in my room all day? Do I want to go out to eat with Canadian friends, or not talk to anyone for 18 hours? Do I want to come home, or stay here? Do I miss being antisocial? Or will I miss the social when it's gone?

I don't know. What I do know, is that an all day Doctor Who marathon has left me internally narrating in a British accent and saying "What? What?! WOT?!" in a voice like David Tennant to everything even remotely exciting or astonishing.

And I think it's time for bed. And maybe another DW episode.